I am not a fan of Pintrest or meme's but today, this week, this month, I've been in need of visual stimulation. I've needed beauty to look at. It's a nice distraction for yourself when you find the people and things in your life seem ugly and you need pretty STAT.
It's only in hindsight I can really learn from the past. If i had only known. If only. Maybe I'd have kept more friends, my dog, some part of my past. I've lost everything is some aspects. Breaking up shouldn't be a war zone where people make sideline comments and can step back and forth over the line. You shouldn't be extorted for money to see your own dog and never get to see said dog. You shouldn't HAVE to break up countless times only to have it fall on deaf ears.
When your miserable, leave. Leave fast and don't look back. Don't try and fail because you feel guilty. Don't bother telling friends who might sympathize at the time and then take the opposite side. The longer it takes, the longer the aftermath will be. It took me years to leave. To get the voices of everyone else out of my ears and listen to myself, my own voice. To keep true to that voice when everyone else around me had a different opinion and judged.
Of course said person will call your parents and siblings to bad mouth you're character after they can't get anymore more money out of you. Soon they move on to friends with tidbits of information you've shared with them over the years, to stretch it into lies from truth. To spread the destruction. Threatening calls to my work phones, to my cell phone.
In the end, after its all over you start to pick up what you have left. A small handful of people, photos of your dog and truth. Truth of the people you had around you, who you are and what you will never, ever go back to being.
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